The Middleton Diner

The Middleton Diner
125 N. Newton
Middleton, Michigan


Over the years, since I worked in a nearby town, I have come to this place many times. Recently my wife and I have occasionally ventured out there for dinner, as we did today, and it suddenly occurred to me...I've never reviewed this place!

And oh boy folks you need to know about this place!

On Michigan's M-57 one heads east from Greenville about 25 miles, through the town of Carson City, and on to the first intersection since Carson City with any kind of traffic light. One then turns left into the teensy-tiny burg of Middleton. Main Street consists of about 200 feet. On one side there is a grocery store, and on the other there is the Post Office and the Middleton Diner.

The Middleton Diner used to be kind of a rundown building with faded linoleum and aging paint on the walls, but this was all overlooked because of the food. But the place recently has had a complete overhaul and is really quite nice.

When going on a Sunday, as we did today, the only thing that used to be offered was the Buffet. Period. But today, she asked if we were going to get the buffet? As if we could get other menu items. But seriously, anyone who may ever be here....get the buffet. Just do it.

The buffet today featured it's premium product [as it always does], the best fried chicken you'll ever have, hear about, or read about. Everyone I've ever known who's had it says it's the best they've ever had. Today's buffet also included Ham, Roast Beef, mashed potatoes, gravy, biscuits, baked beans, candied yams, string beans, and a full salad bar which includes a wonderful pudding desert.

I have been here once when they were offering a deep fried pork chop that was the best pork chop I've ever had, and I've been around the block folks.

Friends, this food is what every Mom and Pop restaurant wishes they could put in front of you. As I've said, the chicken is the best you'll ever have, the potatoes are real and not from a box, the string beans are done to perfection, and if anything is running low, wait about 2 seconds because the refill is on it's way.

The Middleton Diner also features wonderful home-made pies, including my favorite Rhubarb. But honestly the graham-cracker vanilla pudding dessert on the salad bar is so good it's a tough choice.

The wait staff are gracious and friendly, and I cannot fathom better food anywhere. It is definitely worth the drive, sailboat ride, or plane trip from wherever you're at. Come to greasy spoon Mecca.

Grade: A++

Chef's Hand Specialties & Events

This chef is let's say, a little unique. He operates out of a streamline mobile home. Chris got tired of not "holding all the strings" and the lack of mobility. Of course he notes that being a "one-man-band" also means all clean up duties, and everything else that comes with being the main man.

We obviously got there at an optimum time. Because as soon as we were served, seriously, throngs arrived. It was a continuous huge line. But very efficiently dealt with I might add. These folks obviously have a rep and a huge following.

We had heard about this more than once from friends. Their Chicken Club is supposedly to die for. So my wife ordered that. I felt a little Asian and ordered the Two Eggrolls, and the Chicken Fried Rice.

You know it's good food when with every single bite my wife cries out "Oh Baby! She ordered the "Chicken Club" which is chunked chicken, bacon, raspberry mayonnaise, lettuce, tomato, and onion all wrapped in a flour tortilla. This came with their infamous Sweet Potato Chips. These are truly wonderous.

My egg rolls were delicious. Everything that you would expect. Except he puts something in them that gives them a little "bite", to say in spicy terms. They, a husband and wife team, also included some Sweet and Sour sauce to dip them in. Exquisite.

My Chicken Fried Rice was unique to say the least. It was coconut rice, chunked chicken, broccoli, and other cool stuff that made it wonderful. It didn't come brown, as fried rice often does, and there's nothing wrong with that. I loved it, and I loved that this Chef is not afraid to step out of the norm and try a fresh approach. This stuff will make me want to crave it often.

The Chef, Chris, notes that he feels he's doing all he can for a wandering joint that serves it's food in a box and a plastic fork. Don't sell yourself short Chris. The utensils are meaningless. I would rather eat your food off plastic than many other restaurants offerings off the finest silver utensils. It ain't how it gets there, it's how it delivers.

This place spends a lot of summer days in front of the Mobile Audio place across from The Other Place on M-91 on the north side of Greenville. Please, please try some of this stuff before they take their act to Florida or wherever for the winter. You won't be disappointed.

The Good: A fresh approach on many levels. Great Food, with a great reputation.

The Bad: It's a little pricey for the portion.

The Ugly: Because they are mobile and move around they aren't always there when you want them to be.

Grade: A.

G's Pizzeria

G's Pizzeria
2775 South LaPeer Road
Lake Orion, Michigan 48360

This is a local Michigan chain, mostly on the east side of the state. I have gone here twice now both times at the location in Lake Orion. But they also have locations in Bay City, East Tawas, Houghton Lake, Oscoda, West Branch, and then ironically Kalkaska!

The inside of one of these places is a cliche. All the walls are covered in TVs, Keno is available, there is a bar, and an average menu. This looks like the inside of every Buffalo Wild Wings, Applebee's, and every other place that thinks it can call itself a sports bar by putting TVs all over and putting on ESPN. This format is completely tired and worn out.

So in my mind they have a lot to overcome. This might be unique and exciting in Kalkaska, but to the rest of us in the real world, it's lame.

I'm a sucker for ribs so I always opt for those. My friends always get the pizza and once, one guy got the Caesar's Salad (health nut!)

I got the ribs (they appear to be beef ribs but I'm not sure). Oddly to me, they only come with one side so if you're used to the "ribs-fries-slaw" usual like everywhere else, one has to adjust. I get the fries and wonder what the slaw is like. They come with, nowhere to put the bones oddly, and the bones have to be just shoved to the side of the plate. This is one of those little details that by supplying a little plate or pail, could easily make a visit more pleasant. But here's the good. The ribs are great. A nice sweet succulent sauce over nice simmered ribs is a thing of beauty. A half rack is plenty for me. With just a fork, they easily fall right of the bone and are tasty indeed. And even without the slaw, I got enough to eat. But many people might not.

My friend who got the Caesar's Salad had no complaints. But it was a Caesar's Salad. So nothing could go wrong anyway. It's mostly lettuce.

The Pizza looks.....well, pretty average. Nothing as exciting as Jet's, not as competitively priced as Little Caesar's, and not done as well as Pizza Hut. Mostly, it's like BC Pizza. It's okay, but I would only go there if I had to have pizza and it was the only place in town. It didn't get any complaints, and I had a piece for research reasons, and it was okay, but nothing to write home about.

So, bottom line: Go to this Pizzeria, but don't get the Pizza. Try their other menu items. They seem to be better at those.

The Good: Great ribs. Friendly, caring, attentive staff. Free Refills on non-alcoholic drinks. I got to hang with my pals Z, Rios, and Black.

The Bad: Tired worn out interior ideas, and average Pizza.

The Ugly: It's a long drive from where I live.

Grade: C

Full Moon Bar-B-Que

Full Moon Bar-B-Que.
Around Bessemer which is around Bermingham, Alabama.

This is a local chain. And I have to be honest. This was near the end of this tour of the south. And I had eaten a LOT of Bar-B-Que. So, I knew that I had to be careful here, to be fair.

Penny went for the Chicken here, and I decided on some brisket. We both decided on the sweet sauce.

I enjoyed my entree very much. It came with fries, and not much else. Penny complained her entree was just so-so. It looked good, but sometimes looks can be deceiving. She complained that it was tough.

Overall, I liked this place and will go there again. I thought the atmosphere was nice and what I had was tasty, although honestly "cottage fries" are the same wherever you go..... and again, I was pretty bar-b-qued out at this point.

The Good: Tasty Brisket. A nice, modern, clean atmosphere. Employees that care.

The Bad: Penny's Chicken didn't do much for her.

The Ugly: Nothing much here. I will go there again.

Overall grade: B-

Bunyan's Bar-B-Q

Bunyan's Bar-B-Q is located in Florence, Alabama. We went there because we were touring the boyhood home of WC Handy (the Father of the Blues) and we asked a college student where there was a good place to eat in the area. Without batting an eye, he said "Bunyan's". He seemed enthused, so we couldn't wait to get there.

When we arrived the first thing one gets is that it is an entirely black establishment. That is so different in the South than the North. In the north we fall all over ourselves to show that we frequent black establishments. In the south, it's just natural life. We in Michigan have a lot to learn about race relations from Alabama.

Penny ordered the Bar-B-Q chicken and I went for the ribs. I opted for the "snack" -only 3 rib bones....(although I actually got four....man, I love the South).The atmosphere, got up and left sometime in the 70's, but we persevered. A lot of Penny's chicken was tough, and honestly only 2 of my 4 ribs were not tough. I wanted to love this place because of the counter gal, but hey, the food is the ultimate decider.

The parking is easy (wonder why?). Sadly, as much as I wanted to love this place, and the counter gal, this was a dud. When in Florence, do not listen to college students.

The Good: It was in Alabama.

The Bad: It wasn't that tasty.

The Ugly: Limited seating, and limited drink menu.....Coke products do truly suck.

Overall, pass on this one. Go to a chain. Sadly, Bunyan's doesn't deliver. Next to our room was a Applebee's. When you seriously consider Applebee's, others are making serious vocational errors....

Overall grade: D+

Cole's Corner

Cole's Corner
25 S. Greenville Road
Greenville, MI 48838

We have gone here before. The last time I was here, I ordered the fried chicken and it tasted like fish. It turns out obviously that they deep fry their chicken in the same fryer as the fish, and to me that is a mortal sin. I walked out exclaiming, never again.

But tonight my wife Penny suggested we give it another chance, and so I acquiesced.

Of course tonight I stayed away from the chicken. I opted instead for Cole's Corner's self-proclaimed specialty, smoked barbecue pork. One of the specials tonight was actually smoked barbecue pork with fish. Huh? But yeah. Smoked (there on the premises) barbecued pork is the main thing they do here, and I have been hankering ribs for quite a while so I went for the half rack. And a baked potato and baked beans.

Penny went for the Prime Rib, with a baked potato, and her obligatory tossed salad. Salads are....how shall I say.....BORIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGG.

Penny's Prime Rib came with the Au Jus on the side and I never like that. Soak the Prime Rib in it, and let the miracle happen. Au jus on the side seems a little too Mickey Dees style for me.

For two of us with baked potatoes the butter was a little light. Sure they were wonderful about bringing us more, but really shouldn't they just bring enough to begin with? But the big plus in my eyes, was that it was soft. It wasn't frozen. That means a lot to me.

I ordered the half rack of ribs and the baked potato, with baked beans on the side. And holy moly. For a guy that looks forward to traveling to the south every year just to be able to eat at a Sonny's Bar-B-Que, this was Heaven. I have no idea why they gave me a knife to go at the ribs with, since with a little help from the fork, fell right off the bone. Tasty beyond belief. I tried the baked beans. Couldn't believe it. I asked Penny to try the baked beans. She ended up eating a bunch of them. She said the baked beans were like eating a dessert.  Just as an explanation, the beans came in a strong brown sugar barbecue flavor complete with shredded pork in the mix. Awesome. Both Penny and I declared...."the best we've ever had."

To be honest, on a Saturday night, for Prime Rib, this isn't the place. But anything pork related, this is DEFINITELY the place. They are trying. Are they Sonny's? Who knows? But they are the best we have here in the great white north.

The Good: Great Ribs, and other smoked pork entrees. And I would bet the smoked beef brisket is pretty great too. The Baked beans are second to none. Go just for these. Sonny's wishes their Campbell's baked beans could be this good. Trust Cole's when they brag about their pork. They are not lying.

The Bad: Their hours. They are closed Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. On Friday and Saturday they are open from 9 am until 9 pm and on Sunday 9am until 3 pm. That's it.

The Ugly: They actually will drop your chicken in the same fryer wherein they drop the fish. This should be against the law. This is horrible. NEVER ever get chicken here.

Grade: B

Marie Catrib's

Marie Catrib's
1001 Lake Drive. SE
Grand Rapids, MI 49506

A friend of mine invited me to breakfast a few months ago, and he had me meet him at Marie Catrib's.

You know what I hate? When somebody thinks they can make perfect better. Let's take something that was perfect, like, say, the Oreo. The perfect cookie. And then some dumbass dipshit doesn't understand the word "perfect" and tries to improve on it. See, by definition, this can't be done. But still, here comes "Double-Stuffed Oreos."
They totally suck because the upend the whole cookie to filling ratio. And then, let's coat double-stuffed Oreos in chocolate. These people seem to want to stretch the totally-crappy-suck-awful envelope. They keep going crazy until they have yellow Oreos stuffed with watermelon creme filling. And everything they've ever done after the simple, pure, first Oreo, totally blows. Why do people do this? Is it a mental disorder? Don't get me started on the "improvements" in peanut butter, The Wizard of Oz, Catsup, or a myriad of other things. It makes me crazy.

And so do restaurants that think they can do a simple perfect thing like, say....breakfast...better?

Now Marie Catrib's had an impressive deli counter, and I was given exquisite samples from that, so there are lots of good things about this place. But the breakfast menu was so full of spinach, tofu, water chestnuts crap, that it was hard - no, impossible to order a couple of eggs, hash browns, and bacon. Look, breakfast is supposed to be a simple thing. Like the Oreo. But there are always people who think they have a better idea.

My favorite breakfast is eggs, home-made toast, hash browns, sausage, and coffee. Can you get this at Marie Katribe's? Of course not. You can get the overly-hip tofu sausage, and maybe eggs, but of course toast has too many carbs. And it does, but that should be my decision to make.

They have a following. And they will be there a long time. Because there are people who love this, and the hipness, and being in Eastown, and being at an eatery other than Yesterdog in Eastown, and yadda, yadda, yadda. It wasn't horrible. Much of it was very good. But that's because I was with one of the coolest guys ever. But seriously, the food in the restaurant belies the stuff in the deli.

Visit this place. Get everything at the deli, and then get out. And if you're looking for breakfast, go to Denny's. But there have been other very positive reviews about their lunch menu. So who knows? But I still have to distance myself from the tragically hip.

The Good: A wonderful deli counter, and a fabulous staff that seemed to really care.

The Bad: Hard to order a simple breakfast.

The Ugly: Tragically hip.


Grade: D+

Olivera's

Olivera's Ristorante and Pub.
390 S. Dexter
Ionia, Michigan 48811

Olivera's began in a smaller building a few years back and got excellent response. In time it became apparent that the parking was inadequate and the place was too small. So this week, Olivera's moved down the street to a much bigger site that had been vacated by a Mexican Restaurant. We made an impulsive decision to run down there this evening. And it turns out it was a good decision.

It didn't seem promising at first. Although it is a more than ample parking lot, it was nearly full. When we found out they'd only been in their new digs two days, and it was Friday night, and it was 6:30 pm, the 15 minute wait was fair.

The service was prompt and efficient. My wife and I both chose entrees that offered soup or salad, and we both chose soup. My wife chose the Tomato Basil and I opted for the Turkey Noodle.

Wow, these were good soups! My wife noted that she could tell by the texture that the tomatoes had been pureed and put together just right. My turkey and noodle was a combination of penne noodles, turkey, carrots, and other great stuff. I tried to make it last. It had a hint of a spicy bite to it that was wonderful. This wasn't dull at all. I could have made a whole meal out of this stuff.

My wife chose a Chicken Parmesan (and she accuses me of not thinking outside of the box). But hey, when it arrived, she raved about it the entire time. She was blessed with a very generous sized portion of chicken breast that was prepared so that it retained it's moisture and tenderness. Well done, Olivera's!

I ordered the Spaghetti Rustica. It was a spaghetti in a garlic cream sauce combined with sauteed spinach, fresh tomatoes, and Italian sausage. And oh, buddy! Was this ever good. It, as well as the wife's entree, comes with a breadstick that is delicious without being covered in melted cheese.

The portions are generous and we both ended up bringing some of ours home. The prices were modest, that is, entirely fair.

Johnny Carino's on the East Beltline had previously been my wife's favorite restaurant. But they closed last year. We have our suspicions on where the chef's went. My wife Penny declared tonight that she thinks that Olivera's is her new favorite restaurant.

The Good: Great food at modest prices.

The Bad: The wait, but they said it would be 30 minutes and it was actually only about 15. And I suspect they were so busy was because of curiosity about the new digs. And it was Friday night at about 6 pm after all.

The Ugly: I got nothin'.

By the way, the hours are : Mon - Saturday 11 am - 12 midnight.
                                           Sunday 12 noon - 12 midnight.

Grade: A